| To view this newsletter online, please click here. |  | | You've received this newsletter because you subscribed to it using our double opt-in sign-up process. To unsubscribe, just click the link at the bottom of this email. Alternatively, if you're not already a subscriber, you can sign up here. | | | Mind Tools Newsletter 189 - May 3, 2011
Bounce Back!
Why do some people make the most of setbacks and bad events, while others fall apart under the pressure?
People who "bounce back" have learned to be resilient. Resilience is exceptionally important, and it's a subject that we're exploring in this week's Editor's Choice article.
A positive mindset is also important, and you can find out how to improve yours by taking our Are You a Positive or Negative Thinker? self-test. Plus, our other free article shows you how to manage stress in difficult situations using Imagery.
Meanwhile, in our community, the Career Excellence Club, we have a Bite-Sized Training session on Building Expert Power - an essential skill for leaders and managers.
Enjoy the newsletter!
James Manktelow and Rachel Thompson
MindTools.com - Essential skills for an excellent career!
Featured Resources at Mind Tools
| | |  | Do you bounce back from setbacks, or let them disrupt your goals? Learn how to develop resilience, so that you can keep on moving forwards.
All Readers' Skill-Builder | |  | | This short quiz will reveal how you habitually think, and will help you to be more positive. All Readers' Skill-Builder | | |  | Imagery
Mental Stress Management | All Readers | | Learn how to reduce stress by imagining yourself in a completely different situation. All Readers' Skill-Builder | | | | ... And from the Career Excellence Club
|  | Expert power is one of the most authentic and honest forms of power. Find out how you can build expert power with this training session.
All Members' Bite-Sized Training™ | |  | | Working with a Japanese team can be a challenge if you don't know what to expect. Prepare yourself with this guide. All Members' New Tool | |  | This latest book by Michael Hammer explains how to boost productivity by rethinking your business processes. Find out more about it here.
Premium Members' Book Insight | | Editors' Choice Article
Developing Resilience
Overcoming and Growing from Setbacks
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
- American inventor, Thomas Edison
According to legend, Thomas Edison made thousands of prototypes of the incandescent light bulb before he finally got it right. Since this prolific inventor was awarded more than 1,000 patents, it's easy to imagine him failing on a daily basis in his lab at Menlo Park.
In spite of "struggling with failure" throughout his entire working life, Edison never let it get the best of him. All of these "failures," which are reported to be in the tens of thousands, simply showed him how not to invent something. As a result, his resilience gave the world some of the most amazing inventions of the early 20th century, such as the phonograph, the telegraph, and the motion picture. | | 
Learn how to bounce back from setbacks
© iStockphoto/AndrewJohnson |
It's hard to imagine what our world would be like if Edison had given up after his first few failures. His inspiring story forces us to look at our own lives - do we have the resilience that we need to overcome our challenges? Or do we let our failures disrupt our dreams? And what could we accomplish if we had the strength not to give up?
In this article, we'll examine resilience: what it is, why we need it, and how to develop it; so that we have the strength and fortitude to overcome adversity, and to keep on moving forward towards our dreams and our goals.
The Importance of Resilience
Resilience (or resiliency) is our ability to adapt and bounce back when things don't go as planned. Resilient people don't wallow or dwell on failures; they acknowledge the situation, learn from their mistakes, and then move forward.
According to the research of leading psychologist, Susan Kobasa, there are three elements that are essential to resilience:
- Challenge - Resilient people view a difficulty as a challenge, not as a paralyzing event. They look on their failures and mistakes as lessons to be learned from, and as opportunities for growth. They don't view them as a negative reflection on their abilities or self-worth.
- Commitment - Resilient people are committed to their goals, and they have a compelling reason to get out of bed in the morning. Commitment isn't just restricted to their work - they commit to their relationships, their friendships, the causes they care about, and their religious or spiritual beliefs.
- Personal Control - Resilient people spend their time and energy focusing on situations and events that they have control over. Because they put their efforts where they can have the most impact, they feel empowered and confident. Those who spend time worrying about uncontrollable events can often feel lost, helpless, and powerless to take action.
Another leading psychologist, Martin Seligman, says the way that we explain setbacks to ourselves is also important. (He talks in terms of optimism and pessimism rather than resilience, however, the effect is essentially the same.) This "explanatory style" is made up of three main elements:
- Permanence - People who are optimistic (and therefore have more resilience) see the effects of bad events as temporary rather than permanent. For instance, they might say "My boss didn't like the work I did on that project" rather than "My boss never likes my work."
- Pervasiveness - Optimistic, resilient people don't let setbacks or bad events affect other unrelated areas of their lives. For instance, they would say "I'm not very good at this" rather than "I'm no good at anything."
- Personalization - People who have resilience don't blame themselves when bad events occur. Instead, they see other people, or the circumstances, as the cause. For instance, they might say "I didn't get the support I needed to finish that project successfully," rather than "I messed that project up because I can't do my job."
In our Expert Interview with Dr. Cal Crow (for Career Excellence Club members), Program Director of the Center for Learning Connections, Dr. Crow identified several further attributes that are common in resilient people:
- Resilient people have a positive image of the future. That is, they maintain a positive outlook, and envision brighter days ahead.
- Resilient people have solid goals, and a desire to achieve those goals.
- Resilient people are empathetic and compassionate, however, they don't waste time worrying what others think of them. They maintain healthy relationships, but don't bow to peer pressure.
- Resilient people don't think of themselves as victims - they focus their time and energy on changing the things that they have control over.
How we view adversity and stress strongly affects how we succeed, and this is one of the most important reasons that having a resilient mindset is so important.
The fact is that we're going to fail from time to time: we all make mistakes, and occasionally fall flat on our faces. The only way to avoid this is to live a shuttered and meager existence, never trying anything new or taking a risk. Few of us want a life like that!
Instead, we should have the courage to pursue our dreams, despite the very real risk that we'll fail in some way or other. Being resilient means that when we do fail, we bounce back, we have the strength to learn the lessons we need to learn, and we can move on to bigger and better things.
Overall, resilience gives us the power to overcome setbacks, so that we can live the life we've always imagined.
Developing Resilience
The good news is that even if you're not a naturally resilient person, you can learn to develop a resilient mindset and attitude. To do so, incorporate the following into your daily life:
- Get enough sleep and exercise, and learn to manage stress. When you take care of your mind and body, you're better able to cope effectively with challenges in your life.
- Practice thought awareness. Resilient people don't let negative thoughts derail their efforts. Instead, they consistently practice positive thinking. Also, "listen" to how you talk to yourself when something goes wrong - if you find yourself making statements to yourself that are permanent, pervasive or personalized, correct these thoughts in your mind.
- Use Cognitive Restructuring (member-only article) to change the way that you think about negative situations and bad events.
- Learn from your mistakes and failures. Every mistake has the power to teach you something important; so don't stop searching until you've found the lesson in every situation. Also, make sure that you understand the idea of "post-traumatic growth" - there can be real truth in the saying that "if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger."
- Choose your response. Remember, we all experience bad days and we all go through our share of crises. But we have a choice in how we respond; we can choose to react negatively or in a panic, or we can choose to remain calm and logical. Your reaction is always up to you.
- Maintain perspective. Resilient people understand that, although a situation or crisis may seem overwhelming in the moment, it may not make that much of an impact over the long-term. Try to avoid blowing events out of proportion.
- If you don't already, learn to set SMART, effective personal goals - it's incredibly important to set and achieve goals, and to learn from your experiences.
- Build your self confidence. Remember, resilient people are confident that they're going to succeed eventually, despite the setbacks or stresses that they might be facing. This belief in themselves also enables them to take risks: when you develop confidence and a strong sense of self, you have the strength to keep moving forward, and to take the risks you need to get ahead.
- Develop strong relationships (member-only article) with your colleagues. People who have strong connections at work are more resistant to stress, and they're happier in their role. This also goes for your personal life: the more real friendships you develop, the more resilient you're going to be, because you have a strong support network to fall back on. (Remember that treating people with compassion and empathy is very important here.)
- Focus on being flexible. Resilient people understand that things change, and that carefully-made plans may, occasionally, need to be amended or scrapped.
Key Points
Resilience is the ability to bounce back when things don't go as planned. According to psychologist, Susan Kobasa, there are three main elements that contribute to resilience. These are challenge, commitment, and control.
You can develop resilience in several ways. First, take care to exercise regularly and get enough sleep, so that you can control stress more easily. The stronger you feel physically and emotionally, the easier it is for you to overcome challenges.
Focus on thinking positively, and try to learn from the mistakes you make. Build strong relationships with colleagues and friends, so that you have a support network to fall back on. Also, set specific and achievable personal goals, and work on building your self-confidence.
| Share this article: |  |  | | A Final Note
Next time, we're answering the question "What is Strategy?", and we're showing you how strategy is different at different levels of an organization.
Until then, have a great week!
 | James Manktelow
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Mind Tools
Essential Skills for an Excellent Career! |
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